It's been a long time since I've been close to you
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Sometime in the mid aughts I listened to a lot of Alkaline Trio’s album Remains. Specifically the song Jaked on Green Beers on repeat. I had gone through a friend breakup with someone not worth the time and it resonated something fierce.
It’s been a long time since I’ve been close to you
It’s been a long time since I’ve been sad
It’s been a while since I’ve really spent time with you,
Wish I could take back the times that I had
The chorus is just a repeated I hope this is goodbye.
If there’s one thing that hasn’t changed it’s that I’ve always been a fan of a good lyrical dig. Nothing beats a “fuck you, I’m happy without you around” song.
Another friend at the time was making a lot of embroidered patches, so I asked her to make me a back patch of the first two lines. She came back with a back patch that had an anatomical heart with the Alkaline Trio heart/skull logo in the middle with the lyrics above and below. I don’t think I actually had it on my jacket for very long but I’ve always kept the patch safe.
We’re now on day four of a North American tour with Alkaline Trio, something that a mid-aughts me didn’t see coming. I also wouldn’t have thought I'd get to see one of my favorite people, Atom Willard, become their drummer. Every show so far has just made me incredibly happy.
With all the touring I’ve done since then, it would be easy for me to take it for granted or have it blend in as just another tour. Frank reminded me to take the time to have fun on this one. They’re all fun, but this one really has to be.
The version of me on this tour has done a lot of work to be happy on many levels. The people in my life that have been the most supportive in the face of lackluster friendships are a big part of being on this tour.
Before we left, I dug out the back patch and taped it to the inside of my guitar case. I get to look at it every night.
It’s been a long time since I’ve been close to whoever I used to sing that song to in my head and I’m going to have the best fucking time on this tour.
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